WW: This Time Last Year

Linking up with Mama Kat again this week for writers workshop. If you want to learn more about it, click the link at the bottom of this post. The prompt I chose this week is: What were you blogging about last year at this time? How have things changed?

Last year at this time, I had barely lost my mom. I can't believe it's been a year. Sometimes it feels like it's been a long time, others it feels like she just died yesterday. Grief is funny that way.

The other day I thought about her while watching TV and started bawling. To everyone else it looked like the show was making me cry, but I knew it was that I missed my mommy. There are still times I reach for my phone thinking I need to tell her something, then I remember.

Four nights in a row last week I dreamed about her. Not sure if that makes things easier or harder. None of the dreams were bad ones. She was able to buy a new car in one, visit her mom's house in another and in the most memorable she was telling me how she had to fake her death to be a part of the witness protection program. How much I wish that were the case! I miss her so much that it physically hurts sometimes. Makes me sad that she isn't going to be around for all these things, both for me and the girls. Frustrates me to no end when I hear people complaining about their parents.

Being that I'm short one parent now, I have become more focused on creating and maintaining a strong relationship with my dad. He is hoping to make a change to his work schedule next year so we can have more time with him when we visit and he can even make a trip over here. Pray for that to happen because it would be awesome!

This post inspired by:

1000 Gifts: three gifts ugly beautiful

• the grey skies aren't all ugly or all beautiful but they are a nice change. 
• it is a gift to have the drizzly rain, makes the beautiful rainbows. 
• it is a gift to have the ugly attitudes of some people because they make those with a beautiful one even more appreciated.